Three Identical Strangers

Wow! I can’t stop thinking about this movie. A couple people summarized it and the idea of a documentary about three men who were adopted discovering that they’re triplets, separated shortly after birth did intrigue me.

Born in 1961 three baby boys were adopted each by a family from a different socio-economic class though the Louise Wise Agency. When one begins community college, he’s weirded out by all the people greeting him and calling him Eddie. Every where he goes people are happy to see “Eddy” even though this young man’s name was Bobby. A friend of Eddy’s figures out that the two are twins.

Soon Eddy meets Bobby and they’re fast friends/reunited brothers. The story goes viral in the papers. Then things get even more unlikely. David Kellman opens the paper and sees two boys who look like him. He quickly learns that he’s a triplet. The three become a sensation and are on The Today Show, Donahue and the entire talk show circuit of the 1980s. They learn they’ve got all the same mannerisms and tastes.

They’re overjoyed and become inseparable pals. In time they move in to a New York apartment and start a restaurant called Triplets.

But the parents, while open to loving all these boys, are angry. How could this adoption agency not tell them their son had siblings? Their attempts at getting answers and justice are thwarted. A meeting with the agency leaders amounts to nothing. The law firms they approached for help turn them away because their employees may want to adopt through Louise Wise, which struck me as odd given how unethical this revelation is. Wouldn’t it be better for the truth to come out, this agency close and another that is more open and truthful take its place?

A journalist investigating research on twins learns about a study by Peter Neubrauer on nature vs. nurture. In this study done with twins and triplets at the Louise Wise Agency. Thus the triplets and other multiple birth adoptees were guinea pigs for a psychological study neither they nor their parents agreed to. It’s frightful.

The movie goes on to show the effects of this study on the lives of this innocent trio. It’s a film you won’t forget. The dramatized scenes of the past are done with authenticity and the interviews of the boys and those close to the story are sincere, funny and poignant. The film is well made and original. It’s full of twists and revelations that will hit you hard as you contemplate the impact of scientists playing with people as if they were toys. It’s a must-see film. You should be able to stream it or get the DVD at your library.

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12 Rules for Life

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I can’t say I’ve finished Jordan Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos because as I read it I soon realized it’s a book I’ll read again and again. It’s a book that I’ll return to as a source of wisdom and a touchstone to see how I’m going.

Peterson’s style is straightforward and clear, but it contains complexity. His rules may be simple, such as Tell the Truth — or at Least Don’t Lie, but are tough to put into practice once you realize that telling the truth means living the truth. He points out that Adler, the psychologist, noted that “life-lies” are a kind of dishonesty. So whenever you deviate from the truth by saying whatever will help you socially, will give you status though its and exaggeration, or by staying quiet so that you protect your job or curry the favor of someone you deem significant and let lies continue unchecked because you’d rather reap a reward of whatever sort or you figure someone else will speak up or should, then you’re living a lie. So how authentic am I? I won’t be finished with this book till I am completely authentic and transparent with myself and others. Seems like there’s a long road ahead.

Peterson uses literature, myth, well researched psychological insights, and personal stories to illuminate each rule. I came away with a sturdier foundation for courageously getting through and flourishing when life gets tough as it’s bound to.

He looks rather angry in the photo above, but if you’ve seen his videos or television appearances, you’ll see that he’s quite personable. The video’s just over a minute and it outlines the book’s objective.

The rules seem simple, e.g. Stand Up Straight with Your Shoulders Back or Make Friends with People Who Want the Best for You. If you just read the rule and don’t read the chapter you may think these ideas are old school and just optional. However, after reading chapter one about standing up straight, I’ve learned that posture for people or animals deeply relates to status and confidence. Yes, this echoes Amy Cuddy’s Ted Talk on body language. The two prove the same idea using different evidence.

I was surprised to learn things like the fact that people treat their pets better than they treat themselves. When a pet is sick, most people will administer their medicine as directed, while when they’re sick they slack off. Curious, eh? I think we can all do with an injunction to take proper care of ourselves.

I really appreciated how Peterson integrates the wisdom from earlier thinkers and family or personal experiences intelligently. His analysis of the Bible, myth, literature and research convinced me of his points. He also helped me view the wisdom of Genesis, the Old Testament and other scripture anew. I’m not surprised this book is flying off the shelves (virtual and real).

If you’ve read 12 Rules for Life, what did you think?

 

The Library Quiz


You Are an Imaginative Thinker


You are a nonlinear thinker, and you’re even surprised by the places your mind takes you.
You love to get lost in a story, whether it’s your own or not. You love fantasy.

You are a positive and uplifting person. You inspire others to be better.You are full of wonder and curiosity. You feel a strong connection to the world.

Web Therapy

In Web Therapy Lisa Kudrow plays a psychologist, who could use a few sessions herself. Kudrow’s character Fiona Wallis provides 3 minute sessions because in a 50 minutes session there’s so much time wasted on dreams, feelings, past experiences, and what not that don’t add up to much in her book.

I love the dry humor.

Old Flame Part 1

Old Flame Part 2

Old Flame Part 3